Review of 'I am Malala' by Malala Yousafzai

I've always known Malala as 'the girl that got shot in the head by the taliban'; this book is all about delving beyond that and looking into Malala: the girl who fights for girls' education. It's so easy to get swept up by little titbit's about a person's character and label them as one thing, and I think it's so important for books, especially autobiographies like this one, to remind us that this is not the case.

This was actually my first read of the year, and something that I've been on the lookout for for a LONG time. I rarely (if ever) buy brand new books and reading this as part of my work book club group gave me the nudge I needed to depop myself a copy.

I am Malala starts off looking into Malala's life up to her attack. She describes what it was like to live in the absolute beauty spot that is Swat Valley (honestly - google pictures of this because wow the media has never shown me this side of Pakistan??). She describes the changes that were made as the Taliban took over this tourist destination, how they were helped by American forces (an absolute eye-opener) and how everything got a lot more dangerous.

Malala's father is a massive source of inspiration in her life. As someone with a lot of teaching experience, he founded his own school in their village. It was a co-ed, so taught both boys and girls. As the Taliban became more powerful and restricted the education rights of girls, this became more and more difficult for him. Malala and him attended conferences together on education where she began to speak out about why girls need to be educated as well as boys. Between this and her decision to not wear a hijab as she was instructed to, Malala became a target.

The book details her attack and recovery. On her way home from school one day Malala was shot in the head and underwent a whole lot of medical procedures to bring her back to the health she feels today. But, in order to receive the treatment, Malala was brought to the UK alone. A terrifying experience, it was still a tough adjustment when her parents came to join her. 

One of the most poignant and important aspects of the book in my opinion is this last part where Malala speaks about what it's like to live in the UK. Her life is in danger if she ever returns to Pakistan and so she doesn't have a choice about being here, and was flown whilst unable to make a decision about moving. She speaks out about how horrible it is to come to a new country that is utterly different to yours, and how heart-breaking she finds the idea of not being able to return to live in Swat Valley.

In the UK there's a whole wave of people that think refugees should be grateful that they're 'allowed' to live here, and that they're somehow less worthy if they miss home or admit that the UK isn't some paradise. I think so much work needs to be done to confront and tear down this narrative, and that Malala does this in a way that is easy to empathise with in her book.

The other thing that is very important to remember when reading this is that Malala was a child when she wrote this. We laud her up as a perfect Nobel peace prize winning symbol of bravery, but she was a child and some of her narrative reads like that. She speaks about how annoying her brother is and sometimes the text can seem a little juvenile. But, I do think it's important that this is the case, as it forces us as readers to remember that Malala is just a girl. An important and very brave girl, but still a girl.

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Review of 'Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl' by Tracy Quan

Today is a day for endless cups of tea because wow the need for caffeine is real. But, I'm here and still catching up on 2018 reads, edging closer and closer to finally being able to review things straight after I finish them (the idea at this point seems absolutely unattainable, but it'll happen). 

The life of a call girl in literature is, in my opinion, explored in a way that's both not very thorough and also, probably not very accurate. Call girls tend to be used as a foil to highlight certain aspects of someone else's character (e.g. making us realise a guy is a cheat on his wife), or they turn up as a murder victim. But there aren't many occasions where the main character in a book is a call girl, or at least, I haven't come across it very often.

Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl is written by Tracy Quan, an ex-call girl turned novelist, who uses her experiences to really tackle stereotypes around sex work. The main character of the book, Nancy Chan, is a prostitute who largely has sex with older gentlemen. She's reached a stage in her career where things are a little easier money-wise, but as she's getting older she's starting to face the idea of a future away from sex work. There's one other driving force for this: her fiancee Matt who has no idea what her real job is.

I found it pretty hard to engage with this book, and from the reviews I've read of it, it seems as though a lot of other people feel the same. The language is quite cold and distant, where it would work so well as a book filled with emotion. The stories she tells offer an interesting insight into life as a call girl, but don't delve into her feelings about it. 

A good portion of the book is based around her lying to her fiancee about what she does, and it's not told in a way that's justified: the protagonist knows that what she's doing is wrong, but she's stringing this poor guy along leading a double life. The ending is also very abrupt: we never find out what happens with her deciding whether or not to tell him, and it all just tails off randomly.

I'm giving this three stars because it did offer an interesting insight into life as a call girl, told by someone who knows what she's talking about, but the whole idea of a plot or any kind of narrative flow seems to have been a bit lost along the way.

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Review of 'The Trial' by Franz Kafka

Kafka is an author I really struggle with, but I think that's part of the aura of his works (right?). I first came across his work when I had to read The Metamorphosis in my first year at uni. It was nightmarish and pretty horrifying, BUT, has stuck in my mind so well that I can still imagine a cockroach-esque man chilling (fretting) in his bedroom. 

The Trial wasn't any more comforting, or easy to get through. But, it was a true modernist novel, and it was something that I imagine could have been written today, or any other time in history. The fact that it almost sat outside of my own concept of time made it simultaneously excellent and even more confusing.

The Trial commences with Josef K. being arrested on his thirtieth birthday, despite having done nothing wrong. The book then follows his case both in and outside of the courthouse, exploring how the justice system works (or doesn't). As the book goes on and Josef panics more, it gets more convoluted until we are in a nightmarish state of reality, trapped in maze-like buildings and plot lines that trail off into oblivion. The prosecutor for the case is inaccessible both to the reader and Josef, creating an omniscient power that can't be touched.

Although I found it tough to get through, I am glad I read this. I've been making my (slow) way through a number of European classic novels over the past few months, and it's interesting to see how things progressed to a place where Kafka can write something like this. He absolutely nailed writing as though you're in a nightmare: you know the ones where you're in a building you open a door and wow all of a sudden you're walking into a meadow where a living room should have been? Those kind of twisted, vivid dreams are kind of what the book feels most like for me. 

Looking back over the book, one thing that really stands out is that this could describe a modern trial, where the prosecutor has almost become an overpowering and invisible figure through the media. Big trials invade every aspect of the defendant's life, and every single act is scrutinised by hundreds of people before the defendant is anywhere near a court.

If you've read and enjoyed any of Kafka's short stories, or any of James Joyce's works, then I would definitely recommend reading this as a foundational work.

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Review of 'Shiver' by Maggie Stiefvater

It's no secret that I love YA fiction, and fantasy makes up such a decent amount of the YA fiction I love to read. I saw a few tweets the other day about how YA shouldn't be classed as a genre in itself because it's so diverse, and I really think that's right: there's such a wealth of great young adult fiction out there, and it ought to be respected. 

Anyway, I bought Shiver because the cover was beautiful and it reminded me of a book I'd read as a teen with a similar cover. I'm a sucker for good cover marketing, especially now that I work in publishing and know how much effort and thought can go in to them.

Grace lives in a small American town, which is pretty normal if you ignore the wolves skirting around the edges of it hidden in the forest. When Grace was a child she was dragged into the forest by a pack of wolves and almost killed, but rather than fearing them, she feels a deep affinity to one wolf in particular who saved her. 

Each year she spends her time looking out for 'her' wolf, and spies him watching her back from between the trees. Grace is fully obsessed with the wolves, and she'd do anything to (safely) reach out to them. But when a boy is attacked, and another one goes missing, Grace is forced to face the fact that there might be something more sinister than she ever thought going on with the pack ...

This is the first in a trilogy that I'm determined to make my way through. Although the writing was a little simplistic, I really enjoyed the plot of the book, and I want to see where it goes next. This was such a great read for October when things are getting a little spooky, and I might save the next one in the set until that time this year to fully embrace the season!

This is a great YA read for those interested in fantasy and people that enjoyed the Twilight series.

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Review of 'Hunger' by Knut Hamsen

If ever an author nailed the whole plot of a book in the first sentence, this is it: 'it was during the time I wandered about and starved'. Yes, this isn't the most exciting premise for a book, but the storytelling is incredible, and I can see why it's regarded as a must-read classic European novel. Hamsen is said to have inspired a whole collection of modern authors, including Kafka and James Joyce. Having read books by the three authors now, the influence is clear both in the style and writing of the novels.

Hunger follows the story of a writer living in extreme poverty. We follow him in his wanderings around the city as he becomes more and more starved, and increasingly unhinged. There are times of hope, when food or a potential job is found, but each instance of this is ruined either by circumstance or the writer's own self-destructive ways.

I won't lie, I didn't expect to be too enamoured with this. It looked dry, and sometimes I really struggle to get into classic European novels. However, the writing in this was so emotive and well done that I couldn't not enjoy it. As the book progressed and the protagonist grew more confused, it came across the page, and you almost felt your mind wandering with his. 

The story was one that I do feel is so important, about the ravaging impact of poverty on both your mind and body. It explores the extreme state one gets into when one cannot afford to eat, as well as the vicious cycle of poverty (not having enough resources to secure opportunities around in a loop). 

I would definitely recommend this to anyone studying modern literature, as a pre-cursor to this epoch, as well as those studying the European novel. It's also a fab read for anyone interested in a reading a pretty short classic that will grab you in.

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Review of 'Madame Bovary' by Gustave Flaubert

I've got a little bunch of classics heading your way next - these all seemed to come together for me. As the days got shorter and nights got longer, I felt like delving into something a little more intense (we're caught up to September now - help!). 

The debut novel of Gustave Flaubert, this book was first published in a novel form in 1857, after the author was acquitted from an obscenity trial it caused. Madame Bovary follows the story, at first, of Charles Bovary, a poor teenager who is ridiculed at school and goes on to be a doctor. He marries the man that his mother chooses for him, but falls in love with a local educated girl named Emma. When his wife passes away, he begins to court Emma in earnest, and they marry. 

At this point, the narrative switches to focus on Emma, who is now Madame Bovary. Bored by Charles' dull appearance and habits, and finding motherhood not what she thought, she seeks an affair with a man named Rodolphe. 

The book is a work of literary realism, telling the story of the passions of both man and woman, and the trouble these can create. Although I wouldn't go so far as to say it was an enjoyable read, it was a powerful book. The story-telling seemed almost beyond its time, and it is well worth reading if you want to engage more with classic European novels. 

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Review of 'Home Fire' by Kamila Shamsie

Home Fire is without a doubt the best book I've read so far this year. It's just incredible, and I've been recommending it to anybody and everybody for the past few weeks now. Winning the Women's Prize for Fiction in 2018, this book has set the bar for modern women's fiction IMO, and I can't wait to see what Shamsie brings out next.

Home Fire opens with Isma, a British Muslim, being detained and interrogated by the US border force after a flight to the States. She's prepared herself for this, knowing that the guards are more likely to stop her, but the number of unnecessary questions they ask is still a little shocking, and causes her to miss her connecting flight. 

Back home, the younger twin siblings of Isma, Parvaiz and Aneeka, are missing the guiding presence of their sister, who's travelling to study. With no living parents, the pair are adrift and are learning more about themselves as they move further into adulthood. Aneeka's found a new man, someone who will allow her to leave her family's past behind her, whilst Parvaiz is getting more and more involved in it. 

Parvaiz doesn't remember much about his father, but he's always been taught to be ashamed of him: he was a jihadi who died on his way to Guantanamo. Parvaiz has always shunned his past like his sisters, until he meets some men that knew his father. They paint history in a different light, and soon Parvaiz is embroiled in a world that he's not completely sure he wants to be part of.

This book broke my heart and stitched it back together again over and over again. It's the first book I've ever read in which all of the main characters have an Islamic background, and I think this was important as it showed so many different approaches to the religion. I would definitely recommend this to anyone.

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Review of 'The Honeymoon' by Tina Seksis

It's been a LONG ol' time since I picked up a good thriller to read, but after being recommended this by my good friend Aimee (check out her blog here), I couldn't resist. 

The Honeymoon kick starts in the Maldives, where Jemma and her husband are honeymooning. That is, until he goes missing five days in. Unable to remember much from the night he disappeared after drinking one too many cocktails, Jemma has a whole host of dark thoughts swirling around. She knows they weren't getting along, but she couldn't have done something to him ... could she?

The holiday narrative is interrupted with chapters from the past, showing us how Jemma and her hubby got to a stage where they're in the Maldives honeymooning, but everything is a bit tense. 

I really enjoyed this one. I loved the fact that the author used this paradisaical location to subvert the norm of thrillers happening in dark and dank and dangerous places. Jemma was a character that you never could quite trust, and she made a whole lot of mistakes. It moved away from a damsel in distress idea without painting Jemma as some kind of black widow with no heart, which is worringly a fine line in most fiction. 

The big twists in this novel were epic, and definitely made it an absolute page turner. I felt like I was hunting the twist down right up until the very end, and I would definitely recommend this if you're a fan of a good thriller that isn't *too* heavy.

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Review of 'The Kite Runner' by Khaled Hosseini

I first stumbled across this book as a teen in a school library, but was advised to wait a few years until reading it. Almost a decade on, I finally took that advice and got cracking. I'm so glad I was told this, and waited until adulthood to delve in.

At it's core, The Kite Runner is a story about friendship and family. Two boys, Amir and Hassan, grow up as best friends. Amir and his Baba are well off, whilst Hassan and his father are servants in their household. They are inseparable, but Amir is always upset that his Baba likes Hassan. Hassan is everything Amir is not: sporty, brave and more like Baba that Amir could ever be. 

Kite running is what the pair most enjoy doing together. They practise every day for a massive tournament, and when they win, Amir is over the moon. Until he sees something awful happen to Hassan. And in that moment, he's pre-occupied with needing to be Baba's favourite person, not needing to be a good friend.  

Things only go downhill from there, and shortly after betraying Hassan further, Amir and his father leave Afghanistan. The power of the taliban is on the increase, and they emigrate to America as their lives are in danger.

The book speaks about the struggles of being an immigrant in a country prejudiced against you, and what it means to cling on to an identity that you're not convinced should define you. 

This is one of the best books I've read all year so far (definitely in the top three) and I would highly recommend it, especially if you want to learn more about living in Afghanistan during turbulent times.

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Review of 'Living in the Past' by Jane Lovering*

Magical realism is something I've always struggled with in books. It might be because the first time I learnt about it I was reading an Ian McEwan novel (and I really don't get on with those), or it might be because I can't stand the clash between fantasy and reality. It's probably a bit of both.

The main premise of this book is that strange things start happening when Grace, our protagonist, goes to an archaeological camp site. Somehow she's seen people that no one else can spy, and everything feels a little bit off. Thankfully, although at first I found it hard to merge the realistic sodden camp life with these passages where Grace loses herself, the book was genuinely very well written and it meant that you could easily flit from one time to another.

Grace became a widow two years before the narrative commences, and she's still impacted by her loss every single day. Desperate to get Grace to start to reconnect with herself, her best friend takes her away to a very muddy camp site to take part in a dig. Grace is beyond reluctant at first, especially as staying in a tent in the middle of nowhere isn't exactly her idea of fun, but she eventually caves in.

Things get a little more heated when Grace starts to spend time with the head of the dig, Duncan. Moody, reclusive and a little bit mysterious, Duncan finds he can open up to Grace, and together they discover exactly what was going on at the site back when humans first lived on it.

I really did enjoy this once I'd got into it. I found it started off a little slow in the first few chapters, but it was definitely worth sticking with! The author created wholly believable characters, and explored the impact of grief well without making Grace shrug it off when she found a new spark (this happens WAY too often). I loved reading about a male character with flaws and anxiety. This book was refreshing, easy to read and ended at just the right point.

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Review of 'The History of Tom Jones, A Foundling' by Henry Fielding

Whenever I pick up a physical book, and it looks a little *too* long, I always check the font to see if it's a full on tome. But I never check when I'm downloading books to my kindle, which is how this happened. The History of Tom Jones, A Foundling is a full on 900-odd page doorstop that took me three months to get through on my kindle, but was still an interesting read for sure.

One of the earliest English novels, Tom Jones was published in 1749. It's a bildungsroman, which means that it follows the story of someone's growth from childhood to adulthood, and even death. Tom Jones was abandoned as a baby on the bed of Squire Allworthy, who took him in out of the goodness of his heart. Allworthy's sister Bridget begs him to take on the baby, as she knows it will struggle to survive outside of this family. Filled with jealousy as they're brought up together, Bridget's son Master Blifil begins to accuse Tom of crimes he's innocent of. Eventually succumbing to the deception, Squire Allworthy turfs Tom out of his home, devastated that the teen would do what he believes he's done.

And here's where it gets a bit comical, in the same strain as a bawdy Shakespeare play. Tom sleeps around, getting into mishaps and hiding under beds. He lives a sexually debauched life, but maintains his moral compass in all other areas. Eventually all the threads of the story come together in a happy ending (my fave tbh).

Although it took a whole lotta time to get through, I did enjoy this. It really did remind me of a tongue-in-cheek Renaissance play, but the action was extended over 900 pages (help), rather than 5 Acts. Tom was a bit of a trope, a man that loves getting drunk and falling into trouble with the ladies, but is 'actually really good on the inside'. Master Blifil is a great wicked character who stirs the point and twists perspectives at every moment.

The ending genuinely had me shocked, and tied up every loose end which I LOVED. I didn't expect to have had the wool pulled over my eyes in this plot, and it was genuinely a great way to finish things off.

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Review of 'Eleanor and Park' by Rainbow Rowell

I'm *almost* caught up on my book reviews now, which is basically a miracle. I'm only a couple behind now and hopefully they'll be up soon! I'm so ready for my Goodreads target to actually show where I really am.

I read Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell a few months ago and it felt like a complete breath of fresh air for me, but it wasn't until I read Eleanor and Park that I realised why. Rowell's protagonists are the characters that would be the best friend or the sister or the acquaintance of the main character in another book. Her main characters aren't stereotypically beautiful, or popular, or super clever, or all of the above. They're the people that get overlooked in life, and in literature.

Eleanor is a chubby ginger girl whose family are utterly poor. She shares a bedroom with all of her siblings, she wears second hand clothes and if anything gets broken it has to be fixed. When she starts going to a new school she very soon becomes the target of bullies. With an abusive stepdad at home and these girls making her life a misery at school, there's not much for Eleanor to look forward to.

... That is until she meets Park. Park's someone that the bullies leave alone (it may or may not have something to do with his incredible martial arts skills). He's scared that talking to Eleanor on the bus will make him the bullies' new target, but he's intrigued by her. 

Could Park help Eleanor see the light in her life? Or is he going to look down on her like everyone else does ...

I loved this young adult novel: the main characters were different to the ones that always seem to crop up in other books, and it made this such an interesting read.

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Review of 'The Secret' by Katerina Diamond

I'm a wimp when it comes to scary things, but thrillers I can *just* about cope with. The Secret totally pushed me out of my thriller comfort zone, but in a good way. It was shocking and gory and kinda reminded me of the thrill of watching CSI as a kid.

The Secret is set in Devon - somewhere that I'd always thought of as safe, but now will be looking at through a slightly different lens. DS Imogen Grey is determined to put her traumatic past behind her, but a new case threatens to make it resurface. Her old work partner Sam Brown is back to help out on a case. The one problem with this? Two years ago he spilled the beans about her pregnancy to some guys who attacked her, cutting her stomach up so that she loses the baby. 

With this incident fresh in her mind, Imogen finds herself becoming more suspicious of Sam. His girlfriend is an undercover cop who's gone missing, and as Imogen searched for the truth, she uncovers more secrets that Sam's left behind.

This was an absolute page turner that had me almost peeking out from behind my fingers as things got more and more gruesome throughout the book. There were some real twists and turns that I didn't see coming, and as soon as I finished the book I went out to buy Katerina's earlier book 'The Teacher'. It's SO rare that I like a book enough to do this, but I was totally wowed by 'The Secret'.

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Review of 'Alice and the Fly' by James Rice

I haven't read a good thriller in a long time, so when Aimee from Aimee Raindrop Writes offered to lend me this I jumped at the chance. Alice and the Fly is told from the perspective of an individual with an intense case of schizophrenia, or at least that's what psychiatrists have deemed it. I've never read a novel with such a good insight into what it's like to live with a debilitating mental illness. Not having struggled with schizophrenia myself, I feel as though I now understand more about it, and just how life-consuming it can be.

Greg is a bit of an oddball at school. Everyone calls him 'Psycho' because of what happened in the past, and he doesn't have any friends. His English teacher, Miss Hayes, attempts to tap into Greg, to see what is troubling him so that she can help him. She asks him to start a journal, and jot his thoughts down into it. This is what we get to read. Interspersed with diary entries are transcripts from police reports about an incident Greg is involved in. 

It soon becomes clear that Greg is struggling. He has so many thoughts inside him that he wants to express, but can't seem to get the words out. Instead he remains silent, and is mistaken for being cold and distant. 

The one thing which really drives Greg out of this stupor of quietude is his fear of spiders. It is a full on phobia. Greg has every possible gap in his room taped down so that no spiders can get in. His room is his safe space; there's no chance of Them getting in. But everywhere else is a mine field.

Alice and the Fly was a real page turner for me. I needed to find out why this troubled boy's family and associates were being investigated by the police. I wanted to see how Greg's psychiatric issues came about, how they were handled, and how they progressed as he became more and more obsessed by the idea of Them coming near him.

If you're into thrillers, then this is one that is so easy to whip through, and it definitely had some moments in which I was on the edge of my seat!

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Re-reading Harry Potter and the Philsopher's Stone

Every summer I decide to reread the Harry Potter series. I think the last time I followed through with it I hadn't sat my GCSE's yet, so it's been a long time. It's always a goal that seems a little unachievable, but I'm feeling determined this time round, and with one now under my belt, and the second one started, I'm hoping that I can actually see this through. 

It's been SO long since I read HP and the Philosopher's Stone, that I can now see everything in my mind in the way it is in the film. That aspect of imagination has been totally lost on me. It kind of sucks, but I'm glad that as a child I got to read the book before the film came out. I also found it interesting to see how closely the film stuck to the book. I honestly think this is why the film franchise has done as well as it has. Bar a few mishaps with how things are staged, and the debacle that is Ginny on screen, everything kept really close to the OG novel, and it meant that the movie didn't disappoint.

I found that I could have whizzed through the book: I'd completely forgotten how short it was. But I really didn't want to. I wanted to savour every moment. I really wanted to go slow, and enjoy meeting all the characters for the first time, and gradually descend into the world of magic.

Reading back now, I'm still bowled over by the fact that J K thought of everything. There were no parts where I realised that the later books had contradicted what was said. It really feels as though she had the whole saga planned out from the beginning. For example, Snape has a dear place in my heart, and going back to this book has made me see how Snape could completely hate Harry. Here he comes, being celebrated, getting special treatment, and looking exactly like the man who made Snape's life a misery. Snape hates Harry, but could never harm him, and it just makes my heart bleed to think about his love for Lily. 

The book made me fall in love with so many characters all over again. I'd forgotten how innocently obsessed Mr Weasley is by all things Muggle, and how much I loved him asking questions about how things like plugs work. I'd forgotten how defensive I felt of Hagrid, and how sensitive he is. I'd forgotten how funny the Weasley twins are, and how great Ron's one-liners could be.

I'm so glad I actually did pick this up to re-read and I can't wait to get onto the rest!

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Review of 'Our Chemical Hearts' by Krystal Sutherland

I'm still obsessing over YA fiction at the moment, and Our Chemical Hearts is truly a beauty of the genre. I've heard so much about this and honestly it shows mental health in a truer perspective than I've seen it shown in a long time. Usually when I read a book about someone who's struggling with their mental health I get a niggling 'this isn't what it's really like' feeling welling up inside me, until I'm not comfortable with the contents of the book at all. But Our Chemical Hearts brought this idyllism that people create around mental illness up, analysed it and made me fall in love.

Henry Page is an average teenage boy. He's not lost 'the big V' yet, and his last kiss ended up helping his best friend discover that she's just not into men. Not a brilliant track record for keeping on the cool side of the tracks at school. He has cast aside attempts at romance for the time being, instead focusing on becoming the editor of his school newspaper, which he's been working on for the past two years. 

Henry's life is all going to plan, until Grace Town transfers from her old school to his. Her literary reputation at the previous school means that the head of the newspaper wants to make them co-editors for the year. She refuses. Henry reluctantly chases after her, requesting that she works on the paper with him. Despite her boyish clothes, limp and cane, there's something about Grace that lures him in.

Before he knows it, Henry's in love with Grace. But she has good days and bad. On the bad days, they barely speak a word to one another (Grace's choice, not his). On the good days, she might just brush up against Henry whilst they chuckle over a joke, making him blush. 

However, Henry's bothered by the fact that he knows nothing about her past. So, he checks out her Facebook page. At first he thinks he's got the wrong Grace Town. The girl in this profile picture is stunning. She has long hair, the biggest grin and is absolutely beautiful decked out in makeup and girl's clothing. Henry falls more and more in love with her.

Grace knows what's going on with Henry, but she's all too aware of why it can't be. You see, Grace was in an accident with her boyfriend, the love of her life. That's where she got the limp, and where she lost Dom. She's living in his room, and the boys' clothes she wears are his. She's not, nor will she ever completely get over losing Dom. He was her soulmate, and they'd been close since they were five. 

Grace knows what Henry doesn't want to admit, even to himself: he's not in love with Grace Town, he's in love with an idyllic version of her. He craves the 'good Grace' days, and can't handle her on the bad ones. He wants to fix her; he doesn't really want to be with the Grace in front of him.

The rest of the story is about a struggle for love that's based on an illusion. This is exactly what I meant when I said that the book doesn't shy away from the realities of mental illness. I was completely 100% suckered into Henry's love for Grace, and how noble it was, until Grace pointed out that it wasn't. Then I saw what was happening: he was in love with the girl without the mental illness. I realised that I'd overlooked the depression coming out of her grief, and I was waiting for Grace to miraculously get better, and become the girl that Henry was lusting after. But mental illness doesn't work like that. Loving someone can't cure them. 

If you're interested in YA fiction about mental health and love, then I'd really recommend this!

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Review of 'Eat Pray Love' by Elizabeth Gilbert

I don't use the word 'life changing' often, but this novel has totally made me put my life into a new perspective. I've heard Eat Pray Love hailed as an incredible read for years, but hadn't delved into it. It's now something that I want every woman ever to read. I want to lend it to all my friends and family so that they can embark on a journey to learning more about themselves and about life in general as they travel with Liz.

Eat Pray Love is a semi-autobiographical novel, based on the author's own travels to Italy, India and Indonesia. Liz, aka Elizabeth Gilbert, ended her marriage in a bitter divorce. After a passionate, if a little fiery and messy affair with a man called David and subsequent break-up, she found herself in a pit of despair. 

Depression had come knocking on her door, and she was tired of living the same life, just without a man. So, she started doing things for her. First she travelled to Italy, where she practised speaking a language she loves, and put back on the weight that she lost from stress through the divorce. Then she went to India. There she stayed in an ashram, spent time cleaning temple floors, meditating, and getting close to her spiritual core. Finally, she ended up in Indonesia to help an ancient medicine man learn English, and find a balance in her life that would keep her content.

The section dedicated to Liz's time in India was definitely my favourite, and resonated with me SO MUCH. Her time in the ashram helped her learn more about herself, about how to let go of the past and to accept change. It's something that I'd like to do too. 

Have you read it? What did you think?

Review of 'Where Rainbows End'* by Anne Marie Brear

I love a good comforting chic-flick read. I recently read The Savage Detectives (review here), and whilst it was a very interesting book, it was also a very heavy one. Where Rainbows End* provided the perfect respite. I was actually lucky enough to read another one of Brear's novels before publication, and loved it, so I was excited for this one.

Where Rainbows End* is set in 1850. The Noble family have travelled to Australia to rid themselves of the black mark against their name in England. Despite being a loving father, Gerald Noble has a gambling problem. Time and time again, the family has had to be bailed out by their wealthy relatives. Gerald has taken one last loan to get them to Australia and create a new life.  

Pippa, Gerald's eldest daughter, is more than happy to leave England. Not only is she ashamed of how her family has fallen down in the ranks, but she also declared her love to Gil Ashford, only for him to throw it back in her face. 

The family are to move into a valley and breed valuable horses there. Pippa is determined to make this venture a success. When her father falls ill, Pippa breaks tradition and becomes the head of proceedings. She orders the work men building their home in the valley about, processes invoices and manages the family's finances scrupulously. But is it enough? And will people accept this woman as their boss?

I'm all about the girl power, and I LOVED seeing this 1800s lady stake her place in the world of business. Things aren't idealised in the novel either; she faces real challenges due to her femininity.

Have you read this?

Review of 'If I Was Your Girl' by Meredith Russo

I *think* this is the first book that I've ever read with a trans* main character. And it sucks that it's taken me so long, but quite frankly there just aren't enough in mainstream literature. I'm so glad that If I Was Your Girl was chosen to be part of last year's Zoella book club as it gave so many young people an incentive to read a book about a trans* character.

As the novel progressed, I began to get a little (very) concerned that it actually wasn't very progressive at all. Although our main character Amanda was bullied because of transitioning to become a girl, she did have things a little easier than most trans people. For starters, Amanda knew she wanted to be a girl from a young age. She's overtly feminine. She also gets hormone treatment and surgery to fully transition to a girl that honestly would not be available to the majority of trans* youth. I felt disillusioned by how idyllic the whole setup was. 

When I got to the end of the novel, however, there was a note from the author, Meredith Russo, who is trans* herself, to the reader. In it, she explains that this idyll of transitioning was purposeful; she isn't naive about how things really work. She wanted to show what being trans could be like if things were easy. It also makes it easier for cis readers to accept Amanda as a girl. In my opinion, this makes the novel a good step in to trans* literature, I just wish this note was at the beginning of the novel! Although dark subjects are discussed, it shows the positive sides to the practicalities of being trans*, like how easy it was for Amanda to get treatment. I would love to see Russo write a YA novel about an individual who couldn't get treatment, and how they struggled. 

In the novel, Amanda has just moved to a new school. She's come to live with her dad after a violent attack on her in her hometown. The attack came about because Amanda used to be Andrew, and some of her classmates couldn't accept the change. Amanda is keen to make a fresh start. She wants to keep her head down to make it through high school alive, get good grades and go to college. All goes well until she realises that she's falling in love with a boy at her school. Can Amanda really keep the past behind her?

Have you read it? What did you think?

Review of 'The Savage Detectives' by Roberto Bolaño

I was doing really well at keeping up to date on posting on this blog last month, and then I read this massive tome. So, sorry for my absence, but this novel took a while to work through. I was meant to read it two and a half years ago as part of my lit course, but it was big and heavy with small font so I avoided it at all costs and Wiki'd it for the seminar. I've read quite a few nice, speedy novels recently so I thought it was time to tackle it.

The Savage Detectives is one of Bolaño's longest works. Initially a poet, he turned to, in his opinion, an inferior form of literature: fiction. Bolaño was a traveller, and spent most of his life poor, finally turning to fiction as a way to secure income. 

Usually I wouldn't do a little author bio for you, but as one of the main characters, Arturo Belano is a loosely autobiographical figure, I felt as though it was important.

The novel is very much a South American novel. Not all of the text, or possibly not even the majority of the text, takes place in South America, and yet it remains an intangible zone throughout the entirety of the novel. It's there in the conversation between narrators, and there in the discussion of literature, which features heavily in the book. 

The Savage Detectives is written in three parts. The first is a story from the viewpoint of a 17 year old poet named Garcia Madero. He becomes entangled with a group of poets who name themselves the visceral realists. Even if you search this term, all you get are mentions of Bolaño and this novel. It's a form of poetry that is discussed at length in the text, but as with any avant-garde form of art, it's true form is never pinpointed. It's un-pinpoint-ability is part of what it is.

The second part features over 40 narrators. It's confusing, and at some times mindless. Some narrators only feature once, and some come in waves of repetition. It took me a while to link this mass of scenes, but the one thing they all have in common is that these people have met Arturo Belano and Ulises Lima, the founders of visceral realism. These people tell stories that span twenty years as well as multiple continents. Movement between chapters and narratives is harsh and abrupt. It constantly keeps you questioning and leads you off into different realms of thought. Again, I feel as though this is part of the idea of visceral realism.

If you define 'visceral' you come across the idea of something relating to ones feelings rather than to ones intellect. This features throughout The Savage Detectives. We're met with  crude sexual scenes, scenes of abject poverty, alcoholism and the desire to learn. Belano and Lima do not do what they need to do in life, they do what they feel like doing. 

The final section picks up exactly where the first section leaves off. Belano, Lima and Garcia Madero are travelling across the desert with a prostitute they saved from her pimp. The pimp is hot on their tails, but they're also in search of a visceral realist poetess, who has only ever published one piece of work. This final section follows them in their journey to the heart of visceral realism. 

Have you read this? What did you think?